Monday 21 July My mother told me never to admit that I was feeling depressed. She said: "I remember well when your father and I had not long started going out together and I'd had a bad day at work, that night when he came to meet me and I told him I was feeling depressed. D'you know what he did? He cycled off and left me sitting there on the wall nursing my depression!"
There is only so much even good friends can take of my rattling on about how low I feel. What is the saying? Smile and the world smiles with you. Cry and you cry alone. My friends were very good to take me out to Zizzi's for a meal tonight but I must remember that each of them has their own worries.
On my down days I bemoan the fact that I have left community life for living on my own and have exchanged a life of aiming at perfection for a very different and varied life style. However, I can't expect members of my own family to walk in my shoes and appreciate why I still find it difficult to adapt to life in Civvie Street. But the truth is I belong to neither walks of life.
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